Change is disorienting. One day, you wake up and realize you don’t quite fit into the shape of your old self anymore.

The things you once loved don’t excite you the same way. The people you once felt so aligned with and close to suddenly seem to be moving in a direction than you are. Even the way you respond to situations begins to shift — maybe with more patience, more wisdom, or simply a quieter sense of knowing.

Personal growth is beautiful, but when you’re in the throes of it, it can also feel deeply unsettling. Lonely, even. There’s a strange grief in realizing you are no longer the person you used to be, even if that version of you carried pain, limiting beliefs, or habits that no longer serve you. It’s okay to feel conflicted. It’s okay to feel like you’re straddling two different worlds: the person you were and the person you’re becoming.

But here’s the thing: in order to step fully into your next chapter, you have to make peace with the versions of yourself you’re leaving behind. And one of the most powerful ways to do that? Visualization.

Holding a Funeral For Your Past Self

One of the practices that helped me most in my growth journey is visualizing a funeral for my past self. It sounds dramatic, I know. But think about it: we hold ceremonies for all kinds of transitions in life — weddings, graduations, birthdays — because they help us process change. So why not create a ritual for the transition between who you were and who you’re becoming?

I remember a particularly hard moment in my own journey when I realized I was finally ready to let go of certain survival mechanisms I developed in childhood. Growing up, I had learned to be hyper-aware, to always read the room, and to anticipate problems before they even happened so I could protect myself. But through both therapy and working on my personal health, I realized I had lived so much of my life in a state of fight or flight, and that constantly being in this evolutionary “survival mode” was what was exhausting me.

And once I noticed this, I began to see how it would pop up in my day-to-day life more and more. Panicking when I didn’t have the perfect response to a question in a meeting. Constantly scanning everyone’s moods to make sure everyone seemed happy. And I just finally decided I no longer wanted to be the version of myself who saw life as something to endure or be on guard against instead of something to experience.

So, I mentally visualized saying goodbye to her. A technique I learned in therapy, I closed my eyes, imagined the tired, anxious, survivalist woman standing in front of me, and thanked her for everything she had done. For everything she did to keep me safe.

Then I told her it was okay to rest now, that I would take it from here. In my mind, I watched her as I walked away, and it felt a lot like a chapter closing, like a long-held breath exhaling. And when I opened my eyes, I felt so much lighter. I felt more like myself.

Obviously, there are days and times I still struggle with my anxiety, but I’m so much more equipped to handle those moments when my survival instincts do rear their head. Some days it’s hard, but most days it’s as easy as reminding that version of myself, “Girl, I told you I got this”.

How to Use Visualization to Step Into Your Next Chapter

If you’re in a season of growth and feel torn between who you’ve been and who you’re becoming, here are some ways you can use visualization to process the transition:

1. Picture Your Past Self and Have a “Conversation”

Find a quiet space, close your eyes, and visualize an older version of yourself sitting across from you. Maybe it’s the version of you who stayed in unhealthy relationships, who played small to make others comfortable, who didn’t believe they were worthy of more. What does this past self need to hear from you? Thank them for what they’ve taught you, but let them know you’re ready to move forward.

2. Write a Letter to the Old Version of You

If visualizing feels difficult, try writing. Address a letter to your past self, acknowledging their struggles, their lessons, and the role they played in your life. Then, let them go. Burn the letter, rip it up, or simply tuck it away as a symbolic act of release.

3. Create a Vision for Who You’re Becoming

After honoring your past, turn your focus forward. Close your eyes and visualize the future version of yourself—the one who has stepped fully into their healing, their confidence, their growth. What do they look like? How do they carry themselves? What habits do they have? The more clearly you see them, the more easily you can start embodying them today.

4. Choose a Symbolic Action to Mark the Transition

Sometimes, we need a physical action to symbolize an internal shift. Maybe that means getting rid of clothes that no longer reflect your style, changing your social media bio, or rearranging your space. Even small changes can reinforce the idea that you are stepping into something new.

5. Give Yourself Permission to Evolve

Growth is not a betrayal of your past self—it’s an expansion. You are not abandoning who you were; you are honoring them by allowing yourself to become more. Give yourself permission to change your mind, to outgrow things, to redefine what matters to you. That’s what life is—a constant unfolding.

Closing Thoughts

Letting go of past versions of yourself isn’t always easy, but it’s necessary. And as you step into who you are becoming, know that you are allowed to do so with grace, with gratitude, and with excitement for all that’s ahead.

You are not lost. You are simply in the in-between. And soon, you’ll realize you’ve arrived exactly where you’re meant to be.